Books That Heal Kids: parent separation

Showing posts with label parent separation. Show all posts
Showing posts with label parent separation. Show all posts

Book Review: Emily's Blue Period

Author: Cathleen Daly
Illustrator: Lisa Brown
Interest Level: Ages 6 and Up

From the Book Jacket: Emily wants to be an artist. She likes painting and loves the way artists like Pablo Picasso mixed things up. 

Emily's life is a little mixed up right now. Her dad doesn't live at home anymore, and it feels like everything around her is changing. 

"When Picasso was very sad," says Emily, "he only painted in shades of blue. And now I am in my blue period." It might last quite some time. 

Why It's On My Bookshelf: This is a story of a girl who is struggling with her parent's divorce and living between two homes. As she is studying about Pablo Picasso, she relates to the sadness he once felt in his life. It's hard to cope with dark feelings when you don't know what to do with them. She is inspired through art to find her healing. 



Her art teacher gives the class an assignment to make a collage of their house. But since Emily has two homes she is not sure which one to make. Her mom and little brother remind her a lot of people have more than one home. "Home is where the heart is." Emily is inspired to create a collage that represents her home, not a house. She says, "It's the home of my heart."


That night Emily notices a purple blob in the middle of her collage. She is upset her brother scribbled on the collage. But he shares, "It's not a scribble. It's a purple heart. I think your collage is the home of my heart, too!" This was my favorite part of the story. Both children find healing through her artwork. 

If you are working with children going through family change and they are feeling torn or mixed up about going between two homes - I highly recommend this book. What I love as a counselor is the opportunity it gives me to create a heart collage as part of the healing process. This is bibliotherapy at it's best and great art therapy. 

A Link to This Book and Others You Might Find Helpful: 
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Book Review: Knock Knock - My Dad's Dream for Me

Knock Knock: My Dad's Dream For Me
Author: Daniel Beaty
Illustrator: Bryan Collier

From the Book Jacket: Every morning, I play a game with my father. He goes KNOCK KNOCK on my door, and I pretend to be asleep till he gets right next to the bed. And my papa, he tells me, "I love you."

But what happens when, one day, that KNOCK KNOCK doesn't come? This powerful and inspiring book shows the love that an absent parent can leave behind, and the strength that children find in themselves as they grow up and follow their dreams.

Why It's On My Bookshelf: This is the one of the most powerful books I've read all year. There are many children in my school dealing with an absent parent. Their pain is real and very present. Can you imagine carrying that around all day? Knock Knock My Dad's Dream For Me tells kids they don't have to let this emotional baggage drag them down. They can knock down the doors and open new ones to their dreams. They can become their best and have a bright, beautiful future. The last few pages are full of these inspirational words with such touching illustrations of a father and son embracing had me teary.....but hopeful as a counselor that I can offer love and light though such a healing book.




At the end of the book Author Daniel Beaty gives the reader insight as to why he wrote this book. I'm forever changed because of it. Daniel, thank you for opening your heart so that so many others could be opened too.

Author's Note
When I was a small child, my father was my principal caregiver. While my mother was at the office working, my father would change my diapers, feed me, and let me ride on his shoulders to the grocery store. He also woke me up each morning with our private Knock Knock game. When I was three, he was incarcerated. My mother took me to visit him in prison, and he was behind glass. This experience was traumatic for me, and I was not allowed to visit my father again in prison for many years. As I grew older, I became aware of the tremendous void created by my father's absence. On my journey to adulthood, I realized how important it was for me to address the pain created by this separation. Later, as an educator of small children, I discovered how many of my students were also dealing with the loss of a father from incarceration, divorce, or sometimes even death. This experience prompted me to tell the story of this loss from a child's perspective and also to offer hope that every fatherless child can still create the most beautiful life possible.

A Link to This Book and Others You Might Find Helpful:


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Book Review: Howard B Wigglebottom Learns About Mud and Rainbows

Author: Howard Binkow
Illustrator: Susan F Cornelison
Interest Level: Ages 4-8

About This Book: The author of the "Howard B. Wigglebottom" series shows the caring side of Howard the bunny. Howard likes to make things better for those around them. When he sees a need, he meets it. He helps a classmate get to school, helps the class pets get exercise, and does some much needed cleaning for his Momma. He is a shining example of kindness and helpfulness. But one day he comes upon a need he can't fix. His best friend Ali's parents have been fighting a lot and she thinks it's all her fault. For the first time, Howard sees he might not be able to fix Ali's problem. All he can think to do to solve the problem is listen to his friend's feelings. He turns to Momma bunny for her expert advice - "When we find something we can't fix, we can change the way we think and feel about it."  She also points out that listening is the biggest gift he can give his friend. Later, as Howard explains to Ali it's not her fault that her parents are having problems he accidentally takes a dive in the mud. "Howard learned that sometimes life gives you RAINBOWS and sometimes you get MUD!" Life is all about ups and downs, it's how we deal with it that matters most. Ali learns this through her great friend - Howard B. Wigglebottom. The illustrations don't disappoint and border on adorable.

Why It's On My Bookshelf: This is a very nurturing read for students. I just love it. What a FANTASTIC book to bring out the loving caring sides of kids. I am constantly noticing the GOOD I see in students. They are always wanting to help those around them. This story encourages healthy friendship. Part of being a "healthy" friend is recognizing when a problem is maybe too big to solve and may require adult help or advice. And maybe sometimes, being a good friend is being a good listener. Love that! We can't fix everything but we can sure just be there for each other. The other reason I love this story is it helps kids whose parents are going through a divorce or are fighting. It is so important they hear it's not their fault. We assume they already know this - they don't. One thing I would love with this story is a Howard B. Wigglebottom puppet. The students would love it. There isn't one yet but I hope one gets created.

Check out the author's website. All kinds of cool features for kids, educators, and parents.

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Book Review: My Mother's House, My Father's House



Author: C.B. Christiansen
illustrated by Irene Trivas
Interest Level: K-3

About The Book: A little girl tells how she lives with her mother during the week and her father on the weekends. . . . The girl feels comfortable and at home in both places, but has definite ideas about how she will live when she grows up.

Why It's On The Bookshelf: This is a common situation for many children who go back and forth between parents. Or as one student said to me, "They share me." In my school, this book is very popular with children of divorce. They relate to the little girl in the story and are able to share what their 'back and forth' looks like and feels like. If it gets kids to open up about their lives, I feel like it's a winner. My Mother's House, My Father's House offers validation and hope. I say hope because of the last page in this book. The little girl has a vision of growing up and having her own home one day and not having to go back and forth anymore. It's an older book.....but a good one. I'm not always impressed with divorce bibliotherapy, but this one will never leave my shelf.

A Link to This Book and Others You Might Find Helpful:
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Book Review: When They Fight

Author: Kathryn White
Illustrated by Cliff Wright 
Interest Level: K-3


About This Book: In a stressful family situation, children can find it difficult to express their feelings. This book provides a wonderful opportunity for children and parents to talk about their feelings together....It confirms for children many of the feelings they experience during parental fights - the fear, isolation and sadness - and yet ends with an uplifting resolution. Not only families but also mental health professionals can use this impressive book as a jumping-off point for healing discussion. Dr. Barbara Kezur, Ph.D, Psychology



When they fight,
the world shakes.
The house quakes.

When they are friends,
the sun comes out.
I float on the clouds.

Why It's On My Bookshelf: I purchased this book for a 8 year old boy who was going through an extremely rough time when his parents split up. There was a lot of fighting going on in front of him.  Kids often don't have the words to articulate the pain they are feeling when they witness a fight (argument, verbal abuse) between parents. When parents bad-mouth each other it goes straight to the core of the child and destroys their self-esteem. Who knew that a story about a badger could be so healing for kids.......get this one on your shelf.

A Link to This Book:
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Book Review: Mom and Dad Glue


Author: Kes Gray
Illustrated by Lee Wildish
Interest Level: K-3


About the Book: Divorce is an unhappy fact that affects many children's lives, and the story told in this picture book was written for just such little boys and girls. Its message can help soothe their feelings and make them aware that their parents' separation is in no way their fault. A little boy tells his story in simple verse as he discovers that . . .

"My mom and dad are broken,

I don't know what to do.
My mom and dad have come undone,
I need to find some glue."

He goes into a store that sells many different kinds of glue, but of course, there is no glue that will repair a broken marriage. With some gentle words from the store's proprietress, he learns that he can pull his life together and smile again. Parents who are divorcing will value this book as a story they can read to their child and help him understand that although their marriage has not worked out, they still love him as they always have and always will.

Why It's On My Bookshelf: This is a good one. When I grew up, no one ever talked about divorce. Kids just kept all of their feelings bottled up. Mom and Dad Glue opens the door to healing and helping kids realize it's not their fault and also not their job to fix the parents.  This is one of the best children's books about divorce I have read. Visit the Kids In The Middle website, it's a helpful resource for parents and children who are struggling with divorce.


A Link to This Book and Others You Might Find Helpful:
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