Books That Heal Kids: put-downs

Showing posts with label put-downs. Show all posts
Showing posts with label put-downs. Show all posts

Book Review: Rain Boy

Author/Illustrator: Dylan Glynn

From the Book Jacket: Rain Boy is not very popular. Wherever he goes he brings wet. But everyone loves Sun Kidd, who brings sunshine. Only Sun Kidd sees what's special about Rain Boy. But when she invites him to her birthday party, disaster strikes, and Rain Boy storms. Will the other kids ever appreciate Rain Boy for being himself? Can Rain boy learn to love his rain? This is a story with all the emotions of the rainbow and about isolation, individuality, and self-love. 

Why It's On My Bookshelf: This one is full of messages about including others, standing up for someone being bullied, and self-love. I think it would be a great community builder to help start relationships out with kindness. Everyone brings something a little different to the group. Lets teach kids to appreciate those qualities that are unique and special. Love this one!

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Book Review: Peanut Butter and Jellyfish

Author/Illustrator: Jarrett Krosoczka
Interest Level: Ages 4 and Up

From the Book Jacket: Peanut Butter and Jellyfish are best of friends and swim up, down, around, and through their ocean home. Crabby is not their best friend. But when Crabby gets in trouble, will Peanut Butter and Jellyfish come to the rescue? You bet they will! This is a funny and touching story of friendships old and new, and about being brave enough to apologize. 

Why It's On My Bookshelf: This story started out like a lot of other books I have read. There is some teasing going on and the one doing the mean behavior finds himself in some danger. The two friends who were experiencing the put downs do the right thing and save him. 

But I really love what the author does to help Crabby (the bully in the story) turn his behavior around. He has him take responsibility. First there is an apology.....which I don't always see in books. 



Then Crabby admits why he was doing all the teasing.....



What makes this book so special and AWESOME is the story goes a step further and makes everything come full circle for ALL the characters. When the teasing is happening, Peanut Butter and Jellyfish do some ignoring and are very assertive. And amends are made. That's real life and these are the skills we should be teaching kids. 

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Book Review: Desmond and The Very Mean Word

Authors: Archbishop Desmond Tutu and 
Douglas Carlton Abrams
illustrated by A.G. Ford

From the Book Jacket: Desmond was very proud of his new bicycle. He was the only child in the whole township who had one, and he couldn't wait to show it to Father Trevor. 

When Desmond takes his new bicycle out for a ride, his pride and joy turn to hurt and anger when some boys shout a very mean word at him. No matter what he tries, Desmond can't stop thinking about what the boys said. With the wise advice of kindly Father Trevor, Desmond learns an important lesson about understanding his conflicted feelings and how to forgive.  

Based on a real-life experience from Archbishop Desmond Tutu's own childhood in South Africa, Desmond and the Very Mean Word eloquently shows a child's realization that true forgiveness comes from within and that all people deserve compassion, whether or not they say they are sorry.  

Why It's On My Bookshelf: This has been an important picture book I've been using with our fourth and fifth graders. Sometimes I'm so saddened to see how horribly mean some of them can be to each other. So when this book arrived I knew it had a message that would touch their hearts and hopefully stop the mean words. Reminding kids they can make a decision to stop a hurtful conversation and take responsibility is what this book is all about.

There is a conversation in the book between Father Trevor and Desmond that we focused on:

Father Trevor sighed. "That is the problem, Desmond. You will get them back, and they they will get you back, and soon our whole world will be filled with nothing but 'getting back.'"

And there it is! Stopping the cycle of hurt is what my students need to hear. Especially because some of them come from homes where that cycle is happening. Forgiveness is an absent thing in many of their lives. When I asked if they could define forgiveness - not many hands went up. We teach a lot about apologies but it became clear the other part of the equation needs to be put out there too.

It is never revealed what the mean word is used against Desmond. I was concerned some kids would get hung up on that. We did have a small discussion on what the mean words might have been. But what we kept coming back to was how those words can have such a damaging impact. And that's why we need forgiveness............yep!

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Book Review: Crafty Chloe


Author: Kelly DiPucchio
Illustrator: Heather Ross
Interest Level: Ages 4 and Up
Book Website: Crafty Chloe

From the Book Jacket: Chloe has a crafty solution to every problem. But when she needs the perfect birthday present for her best friend, Emma, she starts to feel a little insecure. How can a handmade gift ever make the cut? Even if it is very purple?

Why It's On My Bookshelf: Chloe is everything we want our kids to be. I'm so incredibly happy I discovered this book so I can share her example of kindness, the reminder to be yourself, and be proud of your strengths.

Chloe is put down by a girl, London, for making something homemade for Emma's birthday gift. London has bought a Flower Girl doll from the store which is something Emma really wanted. On the way to the birthday party London accidentally drops the doll and her dog tears up it's clothes. That's when Chloe's kindness shines. Her gift was a dress she had sewn for the doll. You might think she would let London learn her lesson for being so mean but she doesn't.

More than all the googly eyes in the world, Chloe wanted to say, Well, good luck with that! But instead she lifted the lid on her box and she pulled out a perfectly purple dress. "She can wear this."

It's very hard in life to sometimes show respect and kindness to someone who has been disrespectful and hurtful towards your feelings. Chloe is an awesome example of GOODNESS. I absolutely loved this story and it's been a MEGA HIT with kids. We are ordering it for our school library and of course I'm going to have to get a copy for my daughter. THIS BOOK IS A MUST MUST READ.

Kelly DiPucchio is also the author of one of my favorite books The Sandwich Swap.

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Book Review: Brontorina

Author: James Howe
illustrated by Randy Cecil
Interest Level: Ages 4-8

Publisher's NoteBrontorina had a dream. I want to dance! But Brontorina was rather large - too large to fit in Madame Lucille's dance studio. And Brontorina did not have the right shoes - and everyone knows you can't dance without the proper dance shoes. Still, Brontorina knew, deep in her heart, that she was meant to be a ballerina.

Why It's On My Bookshelf: If you were at Barnes and Noble a couple of Sundays ago and saw a grown woman reading a children's book with a big adorable dinosaur on the cover and hugging it afterwards...well, that would be ME. What's so great about those moments is when I realize how much the kids are going to enjoy my new find for them. And it is an AWESOME find. Brontorina covers acceptance, rejection, being yourself, differences, and following your dreams quite beautifully.

When Brontorina enters Madame Lucille's Dance Academy she is met with warmth and curiosity. But she's also met with a little bit of an attitude by two girls who just can't seem to find anything nice to say. It's like they want her to fail. They have a very minor role but I pointed out their put-downs. A kiddo said, "They are trying to stand in front of her dream!" Luckily, there are two other dancers, Clara and Jack, who want nothing more then to help her succeed. We need to lift each other up - not cut each other down. This was a well received message thanks to Brontorina. Major kudos to the author for picking a dinosaur to be a ballerina. This kept both boys and girls engaged. The last illustration got a heartwarming "AHHHHHH" from all the students. Oh, and from me too!

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Book Review: The Hundred Dresses

Author: Eleanor Estes
Illustrator: Louis Slovodkin
Interest Level: Ages 9-12

From The Book Jacket: Wanda wears the same faded blue dress to school every day - yet she says she has one hundred beautiful dresses at home, "all lined up." The other girls don't believe it, and when Peggy starts a daily game of teasing Wanda about the hundred dresses, everyone joins in. Maddie, Peggy's best friend goes along with the game, but she secretly wonders whether she can find the courage to speak up in Wanda's defense.

It's not until Wanda fails to come to school one day that her classmates learn the truth about the hundred dresses - and Maddie and Peggy learn the meaning of kindness and generosity of spirit.

Why It's On My Bookshelf: This is a solid resource I use with my bullying curriculum for grades 3-5. Some children are relentlessly picked on. I am usually part of the healing process when it comes time for apologies and making amends in these situations. But what if you don't get the chance to say you're sorry? The Hundred Dresses is a stand out read in my opinion because of the remorse factor in one of the characters. She feels awful about her behavior. I live for the discussion this draws out of students. There's a bit of a mean girls theme going on in the story. It is so sad to see a group mess with someone's feelings. Often times, those participating don't want to be part of the teasing and deep down wish they could put a stop to it. The Hundred Dresses speaks directly to those students. There is an energy in the room when we finish reading. It's a story that increases kindness, empathy, and making amends with those we have injured. I also see groups forming in 4-5 grades so this helps me break down those "clique" barriers. PS. This is a true story!

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Book Review: Crow Boy

Author: Taro Yashima
Interest Level: Ages 4-9

About This Book: Chibi has been an outcast since that frightening first day of school when he hid under the schoolhouse. Afraid of the teacher and unable to make any friends, Chibi passes his free time alone - alone at study time, alone at playtime, always a "forlorn little tag-along." But when Mr. Isobe arrives, the teacher sees things in Chibi that no one else has ever noticed. 

Why It's On My Bookshelf: Holy cow I love this book! And it completely speaks to kids...about a whole lotta issues. I'll start off with bullying. Chibi is picked on and made fun of because the kids think he is different. He's tiny, fearful, shy, poor, a loner, and lives in the country. It's a teachable moment about negative reactions to what we perceive as different. These are my favorite conversations to have with students because they are such passionate advocates for social justice. There are certain books in my library that get them "worked up" about this issue and Crow Boy is one of them. Any student who raises their hand during this part of discussion - gets called on. It's important that they get to SPEAK about how Chibi is slighted for no good reason. I've also got a good crop of shy students in my school. I know they are tuning in while I'm reading. It's an opportunity to talk about being sensitive and accepting of others. There is a real myth about shy kids. Leadership comes in all forms....sometimes quiet. The issue of friendship is huge in Crow Boy. And it's huge because I talk about it A LOT. Chibi's peers are so caught up in bully behavior that they didn't see his beauty. His inner beauty....he's actually talented and gifted (some might call that individuality) in many different areas. How can the door of friendship be opened when we are so quick to form opinions of one another? And not nice opinions. There is a good ending and the kids in the story experience remorse.  

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Book Review: Stand Tall Molly Lou Melon

Author: Patty Lovell
Illustrator: David Catrow
Interest Level: Ages 4-8

About This Book: Author Patty Lovell has created the perfect "imperfect" character in little girl Molly Lou Melon. She's shorter than short, with buck teeth, a voice that sounds like a bullfrog being squeezed by a boa constrictor, and quite the clutz. But none of that gets her down because grandma keeps telling her, "Believe in yourself and the world will believe in you too." And little miss Molly Lou Melon lives by those words and happily sees her "flaws" as gifts. But things change when she starts a new school. She becomes the bully target of Ronald Durkin who tries to put her down every chance he gets. But grandma's words of self-esteem live strong in Molly Lou Melon. Ronald eventually finds out, this little tiny gal does not waver. Maybe he is the one with the "flaws"? Stand Tall Molly Lou Melon is a shining example of "Be Yourself." The illustrations are comedic, colorful, and very entertaining.

Why It's On My Bookshelf: A+  Yep, you heard me. This book gets an A+ from the students and me. Molly Lou Melon is a "hot mess." I say that with such love and adoration. There are certain books I depend upon to help me teach the concept of self-esteem. This one is a winner. I see kids being bullied, put-down, and made fun of (I know, sad) at school. Most of them are not "built" to take this kind of cruelty. Are any of us really? We teach kids how to say "NO" to bullying, but are we teaching them how to keep their confidence and self-esteem intact? There is a silent emotional aftermath bullying can cause. Kids can walk away emotionally scarred. My biggest fear is when children start to believe the put-downs being said. Molly Lou Melon teaches kids to not let it bring you down but to "Stand Tall." This is a fabulous read and Molly's letter to grandma on the last page is the perfect ending. If you are looking for a great story to teach self-esteem and confidence, look no further. It is difficult to teach those concepts at an early age - this will surely help you!

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Book Review: Thank You, Mr Falker

Author: Patricia Polacco
Interest Level: K-4

About This Book: Once more Polacco shares a personal story with engaging results. This moving saga of her struggle with a learning disability makes an inspiring picture book. Young Tricia wants desperately to read but when she starts school she finds that the words "wiggle" on the page. Teased by her classmates, she retreats into dreams and drawings. It's not until the family moves to California and Tricia has managed to reach the fifth grade that a new teacher finally recognizes her pain and distress. What's more, he does something about it. Without belaboring the point, the author clearly shows the ways that children internalize critical comments made by others and suffer for their differences. This touching story is accompanied by illustrations in Polacco's signature style. Youngsters, as well as adults, may find themselves choked up at the emotions so eloquently described in words and pictures. Yet, like the tears young Tricia cries at the end of the book, these are ultimately tears of joy. Thank you, indeed, Mr. Felker (the real name of the teacher involved) for making it all possible. Readers will be grateful for the chance to recognize, appreciate, and share in Polacco's talent and creativity. -School Library Journal

Why It's On My Bookshelf: Usually, in this part of the review I reflect upon how the book has positively impacted students. I'd like to share something more personal about this story....

When I became an elementary school counselor, I was sort of lost in the world of bibliotherapy. I picked a lot of over the top generic books about feelings and bullying that were total flops with students. Maybe bibliotherapy was a myth because the books (I was choosing) were total snores. It got to the point where I was actually dreading reading to classes. And they weren't exactly cheering when I came into the room holding a book.

Thank You, Mr. Falker changed all of that for me and the kids. I truly consider it the first REAL bibliotherapy story I read to students. I watched how the story touched the students as we journeyed through the pages. First of all, they were quietly engaged from start to finish. Second, hands kept shooting up in the air to comment on certain elements of the story. Oh, and they clapped at the end! (it's a beautiful personal story by author Patricia Polacco) I'd been so used to the lack of interest when reading that I was blown away by the sheer excitement and rapid discussion that followed. Tricia's struggle with a learning disability, moving to a new school, being bullied and picked on was ACTUALLY impacting the class. There was a new energy in the room I'd never felt before. It was the story!! I could see it in students' faces. Hearts were opening...kids were relating to the main character Tricia. It was my first bibliotherapy experience and I began to recognize the healing power of books. I vowed right then and there - no more boring uninspiring stories!

So here is some advice I learned the hard way: When choosing new literature have an intent. What do kids' need? Counselors are usually the "eyes and the ears" of the school. Make it a point to know what challenges children are facing and mold your picks around those issues. Always check in with teachers and ask what they are seeing and hearing in the classroom, cafeteria, and playground. I've changed many of my lessons at the last minute after taking the temperature of a class. I might think we need to work on honesty but maybe friendship is the real issue. Teachers are always in the know. If it's not impactful and helpful to children then put it back on the shelf. And sometimes that's hard because there are a lot of good books out there I think kids want to hear - but they don't!  And trust me, you'll know when it's a sleeper. Finally, are you passionate about what you're reading? I really get into the voice of the characters and the emotion of the story as I read. At the end of Thank You, Mr. Falker, I had to catch myself a little because I was a little teary on the last page (read it - you'll see why). I'm not saying become a dramatic actor but when I believe in a story - it shines through. 

Now when I walk into classrooms, students are desperately trying to see what book I'm holding and are eager to open their hearts and minds. So thank you, Mr. Falker for not just helping Tricia, but helping me discover the beauty of bibliotherapy and the difference it can make in a boy or girl's life.

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Book Review: Blue Cheese Breath and Stinky Feet - How to Deal With Bullies

Author: Catherine DePino
Illustrated by Bonnie Matthews and
Charles Beyl
Interest Level: Ages 6-11ish

From the Book Jacket: Gus nudged his friend. "Want to meet someone with blue cheese breath and stinky feet? Hey, Blue Cheese Breath, give me your homework so I can copy it." I looked into Gus's mean green eyes...

Steve has to do something about Gus. But what? He doesn't know how to make Gus leave him alone. He's afraid to ask for help. And he's afraid things will get worse if he tells. When his parents find out anyway, Steve is surprised to feel relieved. And when they help him come up with a plan to send Gus on his way, he knows he can do it. The next time Gus tries to bully "Blue Cheese Breath and Stinky Feet," he is in for a big surprise!

Why I Wrote This Book: From the Author: I wanted kids to know that they could do something about bullying and that they are not powerless and alone. The title shows how kids can make up silly, senseless names to hurt other kids. The plan to help kids deal with bullies is something every child can try. It’s important to remember that every bullying episode needs an individual plan geared to that event. This plan is a starting point that every child can use. Check out all of Catherine's books at her website

Why It's On My Bookshelf: Okay, DO NOT be thrown off by the title of this book. And yes, when I read the name to the students they also give me an incredulous look. I actually like that they are confused by the title. Because what starts as an incredulous look quickly turns into looks of rapt attention. As we dive into the story, the students are right with me. The main character, Steve, is a representation of what I see a lot of children doing - hiding that they are being harassed or bullied. Steve hides this pain from his parents. "What's wrong? Mom asked. Nothing, I said." Eventually a teacher becomes aware of the bullying and steps in by alerting Steve's parents. They empower him with 'The Plan.' They brainstorm, role play, and come up with a list of strategies that Steve can do to deal with the bully. My favorite part is when Steve's dad talks about 'Power Words'. Good stuff. Just like Steve, I see a lot of kids getting targeted and harassed. If you are a parent, teacher or counselor use Blue Cheese Breath and Stinky Feet as a tool to give kids the life skills needed to deal with bullying. You'll appreciate having this book on your shelf.


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Book Review: My Best Friend

Author: Mary Ann Rodman
Illustrator: E.B. Lewis
Interest Level: Ages 4-9

From the Book Jacket: It's summer, and Lily spends lots of time at the community pool, where she sees Tamika. Lily decides that Tamika will be her new best friend. But Tamika already has a best friend, and no matter how hard Lily tries - from wearing a new bathing suit to perfecting her pool dive - she can't seem to impress Tamika. Lily just doesn't understand. Without Tamika, who will be Lily's best friend? 

Why It's On My Bookshelf: I am always on the prowl for really good friendship books. This is one of those REALLY GOOD FRIENDSHIP BOOKS! Get it! There is definitely an element of bullying in My Best Friend. But I think the bigger discussion point is guiding our children towards making good friendship choices. Encourage kids to find friends that will treat them the way they want to be treated. I also introduce the term "good-fit" friend while I'm reading the story. Lily keeps trying to become friends with older girl Tamika. But she is treated quite horribly by her. Yet, she still pursues a friendship. I ask the kids, "This is not a good-fit friend. Why?" Eventually, Lily realizes who she needs to choose...Keesha - the true friend. You will not be disappointed in this book.

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Book Review: Simon's Hook: A Story About Teases and Put-downs


Author: Karen Gedig Burnett
Illustrated by Laurie Barrows
Interest Level: Grades 2-5


About This Book: Simon is having a bad day; a bad hair day. First his sister gives him a strange hair cut, then his friends tease him. Simon doesn't know what to do. Lucky for him he runs into Grandma Rose. After listening to his sorrowful story she helps him learn an important life lesson; how to handle teases and put-downs. By comparing teases to fishing hooks she tells him a tale of how fish learned not to bite. With fanciful characters such as Harmony Hippy Fish, Freddie Fang, Max the Mouse Fish and more, Simon learns that he, too, can swim free from the teasing hooks that people toss his way.


Why It's On My Bookshelf: Hands down one of the best books to teach REAL strategies on how to stick up for yourself without putting the other person down. Kids Love Love Love Simon's Hook. Even better, the author (who just happened to be an elementary school counselor for over 20 years) has a really neat website where you can see all of the books she has published. I have visited the Simon's Hook page and purchased the poster to use as a teaching tool with my lessons. This resource is full of strategies for kids. I've also purchased Katie's Rose and If The World Were Blind from her website.

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Book Review: Don't Laugh At Me


Author: Steve Seskin
Illustrator: Glin Dibley
Interest Level: K-5

From the Book Jacket: Do you wear glasses? Ever been picked last for the team? Afraid you'll be called on in class? Have you laughed at someone else for the same reasons? Someone you thought was geeky or slow - someone different from you. For anyone who's ever been bullied - it's time to change your tune. This is not a book for whiners, but a new language that will give you the words you need to take charge and stop the cycle of teasing.

Why It's On My Bookshelf:  Build empathy, build empathy, build empathy, build empathy.....I can't say it enough. This book never gets old with kids. Why? Because of the powerful message behind the illustrations and words - love and respect one another. Check out the Don't Laugh At Me's website for the free teaching guide.

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