Book Review: Our Friendship Rules

Author: Peggy Moss and Dee Dee Tardif
Illustrated by Alissa Imre Geis
Interest Level: Ages 7-10


About This Book: Alexandra and Jenny have been best friends for a long time. But when Alexandra is momentarily dazzled by the glamour of a new girl at school, she's willing to do almost anything to get to be the cool girl's friend. Ultimately, she tells Jenny's biggest, most important secret and just like that, Alexandra is in! But when Alexandra realizes what it feels like to lose her best friend, and sees the hurt she's caused, she knows she has make things right.

Why It's On My Bookshelf: Just read the reviews:

"This is a book any girl can relate to, not just because a friendship breaks apart, but because the girls figure out a way to stay together. It's a great model for what should happen in real life."
—Maya Brown, age 12

"We all make mistakes. We become better people when we learn from them. I love this story because Peggy Moss and Dee Dee Tardif reject one-dimensional "mean girls." Instead they offer us a real girl who does something she regrets, who recognizes the sadness, loss, and hurt she inflicts, and who is granted a great gift—the joy of knowing a friend's forgiveness. This should be a lesson to us all."

—Lyn Mikel Brown, co-author of Packaging Girlhood: Rescuing Our Daughters from Marketers' Schemes, author of Girlfighting: Betrayal and Rejection Among Girls, and Maya's mom

Friendships require maintenance. This book empowers students to create rules and limitations within their friendships. Our Friendship Rules has served as a guide for my students. Kids create their own list of friendship rules after we read the book. Ask your child or student, what should you do when someone breaks a friendship rule? What should the mending of a hurt look like? How does forgiveness play a part in friendships? And most importantly - how can we prevent hurts from ever happening? There is a lot of friendship drama going on in schools everyday. Which equals hurt feelings, exclusion, and unhappiness. Put this helpful read on your shelf to promote kindness and encourage healthy relationships.  

Check out the author's website Say Something Now.

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Book Review: I'm Sorry

Author: Sam McBratney
Illustrated by Jennifer Eachus

Interest Level: Pre School-Kindergarten


About This Book: The author of Guess How Much I Love You (1995) offers a simple, straightforward contemporary story about a falling-out between two best friends that hints at a resolution but cleverly leaves it up to young listeners to decide if they agree. Eachus' gauzy, dappled watercolors and 1940s-style English countryside settings convey an old-fashioned, cozy feeling to the story about a subject that might otherwise have been upsetting to youngsters. The young boy narrator tells of his friendship with a little girl--exploring the farm, teaching dolls to read, being doctors and fixing broken bones. Then there's a sudden argument ("I SHOUTED at my friend today, and she SHOUTED back at me"), and the children avoid each other. The friendship seems irreparable until the little boy imagines what his friend would do if she were as sad as he. Gentle and understated in both text and art, this has a great deal to teach about empathy and forgiveness. The rich paper quality allows for repeated reading.


Why It's On My Bookshelf: Children are not born with language; it has to be experienced, learned, and taught. And that applies to the two simple words: I'm Sorry. Many students in my school live in homes where the words 'I'm Sorry' are not spoken. It's often a task left to the school. Saying 'I'm Sorry" is an alternative to bully or violent behavior. Some kids simply just lack the language and that may mean hitting another kid. To start introducing this concept early - get this book on your shelf. It will come in handy!

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Book Review: Ruthie and the (Not So) Teeny Tiny Lie

Author: Laura Rankin

Interest Level: Ages 4-9

About This Book: Ruthie, a fox girl, loves teeny-tiny things, so when she finds a miniature camera in the schoolyard, she claims it as her own. And lies about it when fellow student Martin tells their teacher, Mrs. Olsen, that the camera belongs to Ruthie. The rest of the afternoon is long for Ruthie, and at home that night, she ruminates over her crime until she finally comes clean with her parents. Having been counseled that honesty is the best policy, Ruthie, with much trepidation, tells her teacher and Martin what she has done. Mrs. Olsen praises her for telling the truth, and Martin forgives her, too. A real-life situation might not have such a happy ending, but this gets right to the heart of what children feel when they know they've done something wrong but don't know how to set things right. The sprightly artwork is cheery in all respects, except when it comes to Ruthie. With subtle brushstrokes, Rankin captures all the varied emotions Ruthie goes through: glee, defiance, worry, fear, and eventually relief.

Why It's On My Bookshelf: This age group (4-9) needs more books like this. I use this story as an opportunity to tell children that no matter what they have done - lying is always the Bigger problem. Kids can get into a habit of automatically wanting to improve their situation by lying. I love how the author shows how impacted Ruthie is both emotionally and even physically. Honesty is the best policy - that saying just never gets old. You are going to want this one on your shelf.


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Book Review: Martha Doesn't Say Sorry!

Author: Samantha Berger

Illustrated by Bruce Whatley

Interest Level: 4-8

About This Book: This is the story of Martha, an otter, and under NO circumstance, will say she’s sorry. But, then she realizes that her lack of remorse deprives her from things she loves like piggyback rides and cookies, she finally succumbs to sorry. Most parents want their kids to really feel sorry and apologize, but sometimes it requires strategic withholding to send the message. Message received loud and clear!

Why It's On My Bookshelf: Too many kids say sorry as lip service. I am a strong believer in not only saying sorry, but more importantly to feel sorry. It's all about empathy and being social thinkers. I often tell kids that when you tell someone you are sorry - it's like giving them a gift. The number one way to teach children how to give that gift is to model it yourself. It also helps to have a good reinforcing book like this one. Martha is a spunky little otter that will definitely remind you of behavior you might be seeing at home. There are not many books out there on the skill of apologizing, so this is worth reading with your child. Our kindergarten kids love it. Parents Magazine offers some good advice, on learning to say sorry.

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